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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28827789">Tranquility Valley, Tales Of the PTFO Multiverse</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dark_Song_of_the_Void/pseuds/Dark_Song_of_the_Void'>Dark_Song_of_the_Void</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Battlefield (Video Games)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Other</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 12:40:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,825</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28827789</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dark_Song_of_the_Void/pseuds/Dark_Song_of_the_Void</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a series of original drabbles inspired by the real life Oceania Battlefield Community. All drabbles are set in the virtual paradise of Tranquility Valley. Tranquility Valley is a peaceful quantum simulation that is accessed by members from all across the multiverse. People/creatures/or abstract entities find solace in Tranquility Valley because their real life worlds are so fucking horrendous, stressful or weird AF. They crave normality, so hence play fluffy normal-life boring nonsense, after their day of real-life eye-gouging, noose-wearing insanity.<br/> As you can tell there will be bad language, violence, death, sexual references and worst of all, dad jokes. ENJOY, or hate- either will give me much satisfaction.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The Bodyguard</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Chapter 1<br/>
The Bodyguard</p><p>‘In real life, the hardest aspect of the battle between good and evil is determining which side is which’.</p><p>This line seemed unnecessarily blurred as I looked down into a deep valley at the apparently peaceful Loris settlement. The only thing the Loris had apparently done wrong was entertain the opposite side of this conflict – The Auto-Fae—in some meekly favorable trade deals, but apparently it wasn’t my job to think, and yes, life wasn’t fair, else I, myself wouldn’t be here.</p><p>The reason for my continued existence stomped through the ranks, proud and bestial looking (Come on, resist the urge to prostrate yourself at his feet) I thought, allowing myself an insubordinate smirk.</p><p>There was a squelch as My Saurian Commander Syf Taylon stopped at my side and I lazily glanced down at the mess he had landed his large hoof in. It was bright green and clearly not mud.</p><p>“It’s a fine day for a battle, Earth-meat, is it not?”</p><p>“It would be if the place didn’t stink worse than a Largon’s asshole. By the way you are standing in a shit, you fecalescent twat.” The commander was as well versed in modern Earth basic as he was in battle tactics, meaning he was largely ignorant of …everything, especially insults. I often passed my indentured time using my magical words to have fun at his expense.</p><p>He looked at me in that lopsided way of his, one green eye rolling independent of the other. His leathery grey cheek twitched, and the spines jutting from his head quivered in puzzlement. “Your words make tiny sense slave, speak plain or speak never!”</p><p>I pointed, and my master; this porcupine, rhinoceros from hell, looked down. He quivered, this time in rage, his grey hide taking on that telling green tinge that always accompanied inevitable and idiotically rash action.</p><p>He bent his leg up, strings of green mucus stretched between ground and hoof. “I will not stand this! This crime must be paid.”</p><p>“You mean punished?”</p><p>“That’s what I said, are your ears gone? Analyse those leavings, now!”</p><p>“I’m pretty sure it’s of Loris origin.” I said, looking nonchalantly at the bovinesque looking pat, not bothering to take out the scanner.</p><p>“What are these Loris? Heathen peoples, that they dump plops on the ground?”</p><p>“Would you rather we attack only the civilised races who use plumbing, sir? If that’s the case we can always pack up and go home right now.” I was ever hopeful.</p><p>“What! And leave unsatisfied, fool! We attack them, now!”</p><p>“But what about strategy? Loris may have more stomachs than brains, but after trading with the Auto-Fae, it is possible they may have some nice hardware behind those quaint barn-castle walls. Perhaps some Blaster Cannons tied to their primitive hooved mits?” I smirked, glancing at my commander’s own physiology. "Or worse still, Plasma mortars." I added as an after-thought. Lords I so wanted to return to the relative peace of my indentured quarters, aka, my jail cell.</p><p>“Even the best strategy cannot hold back the trickle that is our Saurian battalion,” He announced proudly, completely unaware of the error in his statement.</p><p>I cringed as he pulled his two ballistic sabres from their ceremonial sheaves, the blades hummed as he raised them over his thorned head. (They were pretty things indeed, glowing like twin meteors, giving off a sweet but deadly heat).</p><p>I drew my standard (boring) pistol and looked down at it, giving it a resigned and apologetic shrug. I wished I had pretty swords too.</p><p>Syf Taylon bellowed for readiness, and the rest of the Saurian’s lined up until they created a mortar-enticing grey wall. All they needed was to paint a bulls-eye on their flanks. Honestly the Loris would have to have their heads up their pat-planting derrieres not to see this Battalion in all it’s inept glory, coming.<br/>
If this went badly (which was highly likely at this point) I would have to somehow keep this slug-for-brains commander alive, it was my job after all-- on pain of death -- and I was uncomfortable with both pain and death.</p><p>A memory rose up ‘Jeffrey Shade, for your crimes of promoting independence, you shall be indentured to the Saurian battalion as bodyguard to Commander Syf Taylon for a time of no less than 15 cycles.’ I pushed it back down. I wasn’t a fan of our great and mighty Galactic Dominion and the Saurians, but even less fond of the Auto-Fae. Both sides desired the galaxy to consist of automatons, the only difference was being whether they were still technically organic or not. At least the Galactic Dominion would allow me to keep my squishy important parts. I was fond of certain squishy parts.</p><p>The Saurian charge began and I joined this ill-fated stampede toward the buttressed stone walls and wondered what would happen once we got there. The Saurian’s may be hard-headed, but that rock looked harder and slightly denser- which to be honest was really saying something.</p><p>Hell soon rained down, as expected.<br/>
Auto-Fae Plasma Mortars melted through the Saurian lines, dissolving the mighty bellowing soldiers to charred mucus.<br/>
My bodyguard reflexes kicked in. My life was important to me, which unfortunately meant Syf's had to be too. I reached for him, He shouldered me back, advancing until (thank god) he sprained his fetlock in a varmint burrow.</p><p>I then half-carried, half dragged him back, struggling through the sea of fleeing and wounded Saurian’s, all the while humming an old Whitney Houston tune. “I...will always love you” grateful for one thing- that I, Jeffrey Lewis Shade, couldn’t possibly get blamed for this particular shit storm.</p><p>Later that evening in my jail cell, I got the summons.<br/>
I reluctantly picked up the virtual activator and pressed a small red button. The stark grey walls of my cell faded and was replaced by rolling green hills, a driveway lined with lush trees and a beautiful homestead. It was a haven from my real-life circumstances in a way, aside from one glaring problem. The looming avatar of my captor was there too. The saurian commander’s assigned name in this world was GREASY. I told him the word meant clean and beautiful, and he stupidly believed me.</p><p><br/>
Syf Talon AKA GREASY seemed agitated and bellowed, “Earth-meat, we have these new things spawned within the green squares called horses, what do we do with them? I forced them to copulate, are they good for anything else?”</p><p><br/>
‘What?’ I stammer, blinking at GREASY’s scarlet demon like avatar, he was wearing his unfortunately sparkly cowboy hat slightly askew, but not in an endearing way, and his ass-less metal studded riding chaps had mud on the knees.<br/>
“You forced…what???”<br/>
“TheBennyPenny, stop mouthing questions that make no sense! What are the horsies for? And why are they pastel colours? Their odd toning would not hide them from meat eaters of this inter-webs-world. Another thing, that one has red balls on it’s behind that smell like sweet berries. What function does that serve? It makes me want to eat it."</p><p><br/>
I noticed his bejewelled hat now had a dent in it. “Did the horse kick you in the head when you tried to eat it’s butt?”<br/>
“It did not co-oper-rape.”<br/>
“You mean it did not co-operate?”<br/>
“I know what I mean, EARTH MEAT!”<br/>
“You ride them.” Then I quickly added “ You sit on their back and they take you places,” just in case my oversized porcupine commander GREASY misunderstood the concept ride...</p><p><br/>
Standing there, I, TheBennyPenny in my understated khaki shorts and plaid flannel shirt,  silently watched as my demonic overlord chased the horses around the virtual farm’s paddock. “Will this torture never end, poor fucking horses?” I turned and looked down toward the distant town of Tranquility Valley, suddenly feeling like riding into town for a cold treat, maybe even mingle with the oddball locals. "Should I get gelato or ice cream?" I mused.</p><p>Next episode: Aimizzles Ice Cream Amazons Attack</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Aimizzle's Icecream Amazons Attack, part 1: Gelato is of the Devil</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>A war is Brewing in Tranquility Valley. who will win? Kiwi PK the sky pirate and Gelato king? or Aimizzle, Mountain Goddess and Ice-cream Queen?</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>Part 1: Gelato is of the Devil</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Aimizzle89 wiped her hands down her black apron as she stooped and peered out the Ice Cream Parlor window, her full attention drawn by the growing line outside KIWI PK’s Gelato Boutique. She huffed, narrowing her eyes at his ostentatiously flamboyant nautical theme. Buff male serving staff pranced between the tables, their platters loaded with crystal long-stem serving bowls, filled with exotic coloured icy treats. Those wait-staff were dressed in tight white shirts with blue ruffles at the neck, tiny shorts clutched at their muscular thighs, leaving nothing to the imagination, and they wore alluringly askew little sailor hats to top it off.</p><p>More than once she’s caught her daughters glancing in the boutiques direction. That was what Kiwi wanted though, he’d been trying to kidnap her 12 daughters for years now. This was his magnum opus, the pirate kings ultimate revenge.</p><p><br/>“You’re obsessing, mum.” Her second oldest Downunder muttered looking briefly up from her book through her shaggy black hair, with intense black eyes. On the cover of the gilded book was the title Ancient weapons through the ages.<br/>“I am not! But, he’s planning something I know it.”<br/>“Told you, Obsessing.”Downunder repeated casually with a smile.<br/>Speckii, her third joined her at the window, arching a perfectly manicured black eyebrow at the sight of one of Kiwi’s waiting staff bending over to retrieve a fallen napkin “Well, well, look at that, sex sells huh.”<br/>“And that’s called objectification.”<br/>Speckii gave Downnunder an unapologetic grin, “It certainly is,” and winked, turning back to watch a muscle-bound Karapiro Slayer tilt his narrow hips, as he wrote down a gelato order in a tiny, cute little note book, “tasty indeed,” she murmured before remembering herself and quickly striding to the door, opening it slightly and yelling, "ya mums, ya dad!"</p><p><br/>During this outburst, the oldest, Fullmetalfawn came in from the back carrying a large box of cookies and cream ice cream in her muscular grip. The chains on Fawn’s black jeans clinked as she strode. Fawn gave her mum a quick nod, her long spiky blond, purple tipped hair bouncing slightly, and dumped the box in the free serving freezer slot. She brushed off her hands on her Metallica tee-shirt and looked around the shop. “Quiet this morning?” giving speckii a smirk.</p><p>“It’s that damn gelato boutique and their new signature flavor, Liqour-Lice: The Extra Crunchy Protein-max Edition,” Aimizzle ground out.</p><p>“Ah, you are still plotting his impending murder then?” Fawn said, flashing a grin, before adding more seriously, “he’s cornering the non-human market, mum. It’s a smart move. Apparently the larger multiverse prefers Bugs, worms, and arachnids, over sugar in their cold treats.”</p><p>The twins, Rogue duchess and Nera walked in from the back of shop, wearing their signature, matching, metal bikinis.</p><p>“But who in their right mind would eat Tangy tarantula?” Aimizzle exclaimed tearing frustrated hands through her hair.</p><p>“I would!” chirped the brightly coloured parrot sitting on rogue duchess’s shoulder.<br/>“Shut up, Mr Squiggles” Downnunder glared at the bird, which returned a hard beady-eyed stare back. “Abuse! That is abuse.” He flapped back at her.</p><p>FullmetalFawn sighed and crossed her arms and rest against the bench with a smirk on her face. “What you need to do is sex up this old joint. No more pink ruffle curtains and doilies on the tables, mum.”<br/>Aimizzle muttered “ we don’t have doilies on the tables.”<br/>“I’m speaking figuratively.”Aimizzle89 reluctantly pulled her gaze away from that Pirate, Kiwi PK who was now parading in front of his shop in a large feather plumed hat, with his hand resting proudly on a large, brass-detailed blunderbuss.<br/>“What do you mean?”<br/>Fawn gave her mother a measured look, smiled and said “Let’s give all our flavors new names, sexier names.”</p><p><br/>Aimizzle put her hands on her hips thoughtfully looking at the freezer.<br/>“Okay Then, Hokey pokey can be…”<br/>“I-hope-he-pokes-me” blurted out Nera who immediately clapped her hand over her mouth, eyes widening in shock.<br/>Aimizzle gave her daughter a sideways look, “ Ooookaaaaay. Caramel cream?”<br/>“Cock-a-diddle Cream” squawked, Mr Squiggles.<br/>Downnunder sunk deeper behind her ancient weapons book, suppressing a giggle.<br/>Aimizzle grimaced, “Suggestions from everyone but the shoulder camping bird. please.”</p><p>Rogue shushed her pet bird and gave him a quick peck with her violet lips, leaving lipstick on his feathers. "It was a good suggestion, little fella, don't listen, you are a very pretty boy."</p><p>"I'm a pretty boy" Squiggles parroted back proudly. </p><p><br/>Speckii cocked a brow giving her ma a devious grin, “maple walnut could be... Mabel will NUT.”<br/>“Not sure about that, Mabel seems like a granny name, the picture I get, although fascinating, is as equally disturbing,” Aimizzle mused. "hmmmm Maybe, I guess everyone has a kink or two."</p><p>Nera looked like she was acting strangely, jiggling on her toes, and had gone quite red in the face.<br/>Chloe and Ebsray, the second set of twins came in midst this atmosphere. It was so thick with tension that you could probably hack away at it with an axe for an average earth cycle.</p><p>“What’s going on?” Ebs asked slowly looking around the room, hands on hips looking superfluous in full white military uniform.<br/>“Nera?” Aimizzle asked cautiously, feeling faintly concerned for her younger daughter’s welfare. The poor girl looked like she was about to go nuclear.<br/>That's when Nera exploded, a verbal shockwave poured out and Aimizzle leaned back against a table, gripping the edge of it.</p><p>“Strawberries and bondage, Boycumberry Ripple, nookie and cream, Goodie-goodie cum drops, coochie dough, lick-her-nice, uh that’s liquorice, mum, Rum and raise him, rock my chode…”Nera stopped when she realized everyone was staring at her.</p><p><br/>Chloe giggled, “what the blue balls was that?”<br/>“Blue balls sorbet,” ejaculated Nera violently before silencing herself again.<br/>“Mother of Zeus, that was glorious, Nera,” Fawn marvelled.</p><p>"Stella job, you made our Icecream dirty Nera!" Rogue laughed.</p><p>"This cock agrees," squiggles added.</p><p><br/>“Nera, you are very good at this. Wait… why are you so good at this?” Aimizzle asked, her consternation growing.</p><p><br/>Nera clamped her mouth shut tight, shrugged, and tried to look as puzzled as the rest of them, but failed miserably.<br/>“What about Mango sorbet, and the Blood Orange sorbet that no-one likes?” Downunder asked, her attention now shifted permanently from her book to the ice cream cabinet.</p><p><br/>“Man’s sore three way and Blood-on-him sorbet?” Fawn offered, her smile spreading wider, looking around at the once again silenced room, “what? Is that too far?”<br/>“Just a Squige.” Aimizzle managed, going pink, hysterical laughter boiling under her normally sensible veneer.<br/>Speckii slapped her knee and giggled, ”we’ll never get rid of the blood orange sorbet if we name it that!”<br/>“I’d eat it!” Mr Squiggles crowed. Rogue grimaced.</p><p><br/>Aimizzle sighed, “I may not entirely like the idea, but we don’t have anything to lose other than our self respect, so lets do it.”<br/>Fawn clapped her hands together with a satisfied grin. Aimizzle noticed Nera looked extremely proud of herself and felt immediately compelled to ground her, but resisted, after all this child prodigy of naughty ice cream flavors may have saved the imaginary family business.<br/>“I don’t think I’m ever going to eat goodie goodie gum drops again, “ Said Ebs resolutely, glaring at Nera. She’s ruined it for me, mum.”<br/>“It will be okay Ebs, let’s get to work.”</p><p>***</p><p>Aimizzle grinned at her next customer TheBennyPenny, he scratched his head as he perused the cabinet. “Can I have more than one flavour?” He asked finally.<br/>“You certainly can, if you can handle it, she added, a smirk tilting her lips.<br/>“Okay, right, I’ll have your Coochie Dough on top of Rock my Chode.”</p><p><br/>Outside Speckii dressed in a frilly red and white Barber striped dress gave her mum a thumbs up through the window before returning to waving their new placard saying, ‘Cum and get Creamed’ Chloe stood beside her with an oversized arrow, looking slightly embarrassed. The arrow was currently pointing downwards at a sewer manhole.</p><p>After the mid-morning rush Aimizzle took a step outside drawing in the Tranquility Valley air, so sweet compared to their real life home. She looked across and saw Kiwi PKs store now had darkened windows. He had logged off…logged off early, he never logged off this early! She ripped off her apron and threw it on the sidewalk, barking at Speckii and Chloe, “log out and prepare for battle.” Chloe threw her oversized arrow into the road, narrowly missing a passing cyclist with the GamerTag Jetjones001. Jet swerved expertly, spraying gravel at a strange little gnome hiding in the bushes. The twisted little creature squeaked and rolled out hastily hugging his trench coast tighter around his rotund little body and scampered away. Chloe glared at the retreating gnome ”MUM, lymphoma was being a weird little perve again.”<br/>“Ignore him, everyone else does.” Shouted Aimizzle before she hit the exit button.</p><p>***</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is CLEARLY a work of fiction, so any similarities to real-life people is entirely accidental, and I say this completely sincerely... no, I'm not laughing at all...</p></blockquote></div></div>
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